Carol-Ann Hamilton, Encouraging Your Greatness! Carol-Ann Hamilton, Encouraging Your Greatness!
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Diversity

December 4, 2011 By Carol-Ann Leave a Comment

Definition

1) Variety; 2) A different kind; 3) Unlike in nature or qualities.

Tips

Recognize we have evolved into the age of the individualist.  This social trend began with the “Me” generation and has accelerated as we moved into the demographic cohort often referred to as “Gen Y.”  Each successive generation defines itself in its own way and integrates into existing cultural norms on its own terms.  People are increasingly defining themselves as individuals rather than group members.

Accept the growing diversity of your workforce.  No longer will the next generation of workers feel, think or behave in the same way as the previous one.  Companies employing hundreds or thousands will find their workforce spans several generations.  At a typical working lifespan of thirty to forty years, many employers could conceivably have two to three generations on their payroll at one time.

Expect a shift away from conformity.  When homogeneity and conformity were the norm, managing was easier.  In fact, the mere expectation of conformity gave management a certain comfort in its ability to set expectations uniformly, with little risk of interlopers “upsetting the balance.”  This is no longer the case today; embracing diversity is now a competitive imperative.

Avoid falling into the “goof gap.”  Younger generations’ attitudes can be dramatically different from those held dear by many senior leaders in organizations today.  This dissonance has created a chasm of misunderstanding called the “goof gap” – that unsuspecting divide between leaders’ intentions and how they communicate, versus how their messages are understood.

Recognize that you are not infallible.  Unlike the boss in the ever-popular syndicated cartoon, Dilbert, leaders must collect a diversity of opinion before making decisions.  No longer will it be acceptable to treat individuals as “all the same” (if indeed it ever was).  In soul-inspiring organizations, people are engaged at all levels – contributing their diverse skills, talents and attitudes.

Meet diversity of needs with a diversity of response.  The workplace of the future will have to learn to engage its frontline leaders in real leadership by creating organizational responses that meet individual needs rather than enforcing policy or practice, as is often the case today.  While a fundamental shift, it offers undeniable advantage and competitive returns in a shrinking labour market.

Think of diversity as freedom of expression.  Thinking of diversity as more than simply the overall work environment, freedom of expression implies a sense of congruence between who people truly are and where they choose to work – along with the organization’s ability to recruit and retain the best employees for the work to be done.  It has to do with being an employer of choice.

Questions For Reflection

Think about a time when you fell into the “goof gap”; what will you do differently in the future to avoid this problem?

Is the concept of embracing diversity and individualism a hallmark of your leadership style and practices (selfware), or a hallmark of your words but not behavior (shelfware)?

How can you design a diversity-related intervention that uses the concept of “selfware” to embed one powerful change in behavior that will be obvious to everyone in your organization?

 

Filed Under: Blog, The Corporate Healer

Courage

November 26, 2011 By Carol-Ann Leave a Comment

Definition

1) The ability to disregard fear; 2) Bravery; 3) To have the courage to act on one’s beliefs.

Tips

Define courage as a selfless act to do what is right regardless of personal consequences.  All manner of business, legal and moral dilemmas occur every day in corporations all over the world, and they are the essence of courage.  They beg leadership questions as to what each of us would do in similar situations.  The choice is between what is right and what is prescribed by prevailing legal wisdom to not admit personal responsibility.

Take a courageous stand to achieve extraordinary results.  You cannot choose courage when it is convenient and then abandon its principles when it is not.  People watch you make the ordinary, mundane decisions as much as they watch you make the extraordinary, high impact ones.  Regrettably, many employees’ experience of leadership is spineless, as in “How little courage can we get away with?”

Step out from behind the insulation of your inner circle.  When difficult messages have to be delivered, leaders go eyeball-to-eyeball with their workforce, taking the heat of controversial pressing questions.  Courageous leaders value blunt honesty – always.  Rather than dodge ‘bullets’ by hiding behind e-mails, they stand up to so-called hard-nosed employees.  They also encourage the meek and silent.

Foster employees’ living according to inner truth.  Do not hold organizational truth-tellers as “problem employees” because they refuse to be molded by constricted expectations.  Rather than saddle them with “corrective measures”, seek out those who refuse to sidestep what needs to be said.  Be grateful for employees who fearlessly point out, “the emperor is wearing no clothes.”

Know that real relationships are founded on being real.  Withholding serves no one.  Real relationships are not always about being ‘nice.’  Instead of “shooting the messenger”, welcome those who are gutsy enough to be candid, no matter how uncomfortable.  Observe your reactions to the truth-tellers on your team, and notice to what degree you invite truth-telling from everyone around you – no matter what.

Take tough stands on behalf of the team.  Do not be afraid to make yourself somewhat ‘dangerous’ in the world, if this is what it takes to ensure issues are not swept under the carpet.  Be willing to incur unpopularity with your peers, if this is what it takes to support your team.  Courageous leaders encourage their people to shine, and do what it takes to help them be successful.

Hold on when the dream appears to be slipping from grasp.  The time to stand firm is when it would be far easier to say: “Who were we kidding?  This is the way it’s always been and is the way it will always be.  Who were we to think we could be any different?”  Stay the course through challenging times.  And, if you do decide to “fold your cards” rather than “hold” them, do it consciously.

Questions For Reflection

To what degree do you invite truth-telling around you and what truths are you most comfortable hearing?

What do you observe about your own reactions to the truth-tellers on your team, as opposed to those who hold back their opinions?

How can you incorporate the attributes of the most trustworthy and integrity-based person in your workplace into your own habits?

 

 

Filed Under: Blog, The Corporate Healer

Balance

November 26, 2011 By Carol-Ann Leave a Comment

Definition

Balance: 1) To bring into or keep in equilibrium; 2) To establish equal or appropriate proportions of elements; 3) To equal or neutralize the weight or importance of.

Tips

Treat life as a pie.  Composed of “slices” (career, relationships, health, personal growth, finances, fun), many treat work as the single largest piece of their lives.  Yet, it is one slice of the total pie.  When we allow work to consume us, the remaining sectors are forced to compete for the meager leftovers.  Do not allow work to literally and figuratively gobble you up.

Circumvent the trap of viewing busyness as a status symbol.  For, we are not talking about being positively busy, deriving fulfillment from dedicating yourself to what you consider most important.  We are talking about being driven by and complaining about hectic daily routines, putting off essential priorities until they can be squeezed months later into booked up calendars – leaving more room for work!

Focus on what is really important.   Many are now realizing corner offices and large salaries are not worth failed relationships, declining health and soul sickness.  Work anxiety can poison our entire body’s systems, destroying the very vehicle we need to carry out our work in the world.  Left unchecked, we succumb to what the Japanese call karoshi, or death from overwork.

Recognize that people bring their whole selves to work.  Compassionate leaders realize people cannot be split into fragmented parts – as if a business self comes to work while the remaining self gets shelved.  They strive to accommodate employees’ lives so as to minimize conflicts between work and home; helping employees attend to personal matters creates a focus on work while at work.

Invest in employees’ welfare for ultimate gain.  At a time when many employers are concerned about skyrocketing health-care costs, proactive workplaces find it fiscally prudent to reduce this bottom-line drain.  Eventually, the demand to minister to balance will become a non-negotiable business decision to address employee protests against inhumane workplaces (not just a reactive step).

View work-life balance as a “way of being” one lives.  Work-life balance is not a “program” one “does”.  Otherwise, it risks becoming a “phantom” program-of-the-month.  It needs to be a core value, tracked and measured as a key performance indicator, as opposed to being motivated by a business desire to look good or by the ulterior motive of creating healthier employees able to take on more work.

Exemplify balance as a core value through your own behaviour.  Soul-inspiring leaders point out unhealthy behaviours like excessive overtime and failing to use one’s full vacation.  And, they welcome similar feedback.  Whereas in unbalanced organizations, employees who consistently put in twelve-hour days are lauded as heroes, in people-friendly workplaces they are targeted for “work smarter, not harder” campaigns!

Avoid “face time” as a measure of productivity.  Merely being in one’s char each day is unheard-of in leading-edge environments.  Only an untrusting leader would cling to the need to watch employees at all times to ensure work is getting done.  However, if number of hours spent at work is your sole measure of shareholder value, you have a broader systemic issue than simply work-life balance.

Questions For Reflection

How much of your sense of self is tied up with doing and achieving at work?

Would your friends and family say you spend enough time with them?  Why or why not?

What messages does your behaviour communicate to people about the degree to which you value work-life balance?

 

 

Filed Under: Blog, The Corporate Healer

Acknowledgement

November 6, 2011 By Carol-Ann Leave a Comment

Definition

Acknowledge: 1) To recognize and accept; 2) To show that one has noticed; 3) To express appreciation.

Tips

Remember to say “please” and “thank-you”.  Simple as this childhood lesson seems, we still find that small child who craves positive feedback beneath the well-protected adult veneer.  It does matter if our days are filled with endless constructive criticism over weaknesses.  Counter a focus on negatives with an equal or greater dose of basic human courtesy plus with thanks for a job well done.

Treat acknowledgement as a natural fit with your day.  Taking time to acknowledge others is not a chore to be crammed into your day.  It need take no longer than a passing comment or handshake, or visiting people at their workstations.  Or, start meetings with feedback that recognizes those who have gone above and beyond.  Look for opportunities to catch people doing things right.  It’s easy.

Express your recognition with an open heart and spirit.  Make it “all about them”.  Speak about others’ greatness rather than intruding fanfare about your own contributions to a shared success.  Soul-inspiring leaders are humble, using acknowledgement to build up people.  Think the selflessness of Mother Teresa, who used the spotlight to profile her charges, not herself.

Make your feedback genuine and sincere.  Since people can readily spot phony compliments, rather say nothing at all than be insincere.  Particularly if team members view you as ungenerous in offering positive feedback, your sudden liberal sharing could otherwise risk becoming a flavour of the month, as in “Uh-oh, the boss has been to another one of those feedback seminars.”

Be specific in your praise.  While we hear “great job” often enough in organizational corridors, this common phrase leaves employees wondering, “What exactly was great about what I just did?”  Instead, describe in concrete language the behaviours you noticed, as well as the positive impact of the person’s actions.  This allows them to repeat what worked in the future.

Recognize people for who they are.  Rather than see people simply as human “doings”, soul-inspiring leaders recognize them as human “beings”, valuable for that reason alone.  In coaching, this is the distinction between acknowledging (using statements that start with “you”, describing the unique talents the person possesses) and complimenting (where it is still about what “I” noticed).

Emphasize the how, not just the what.  The how has to do with voice tone and body language – together, 93% of the total message.  The what has to do with words – the other 7% of communication.  How we say things is therefore significantly more important than what we say.  Keep in mind that how you acknowledge others will leave a more lingering effect than what you necessarily said.

Questions For Reflection

When was the last time you said “please” or “thank you” to someone in your workplace?

How generous are you in offering positive feedback to colleagues at all levels in your organization?

Do you believe performance is enhanced by the “carrot”, or do you assume extraordinary effort is an inherent part of job requirements?

 

 

Filed Under: Blog, The Corporate Healer

Introducing The Corporate Healer

November 6, 2011 By Carol-Ann Leave a Comment

What Is a Corporate Healer?

According to the Oxford Reference Dictionary, to heal means: 1) To cause an injury to become sound or healthy again; 2) To “put right” (differences etc.); 3) To alleviate (sorrow etc.). 

Sign me up for all three and more!

For, when I look back upon my 25-year employed career plus examine eight-plus years of entrepreneurship thus far, I notice that the degree of wounding I and others in my expanding circles have experienced is virtually incalculable.

As I so often express in my facilitation, coaching and speaking engagements, I have personally suffered (and survived) every form of Toxic Boss (never mind employee!) known to humankind save for sexual harassment.

The original injuries healed (through countless hours of therapy and personal coaching), I can now express my sincere gratitude toward all the truly harmful individuals who have crossed my path over the past three decades.  They have given me a significant portion of my Life’s Purpose.  It is to transform the workplace by inspiring leaders to inspire results through inspired employees.

More and more, as I navigate today’s challenging corporate landscape, I see people immediately “get it” that there is a Tsunami-sized Talent War at every industry’s doorstep to attract, retain and engage the Next-Generation Workforce. 

No more for the Millennials to put up with the b-s Baby Boomers and preceding cohorts have endured at the hands of lethal heads of business!  The times of “we can get more of where they came from” and “they better get on board or else” are mercifully over! 

A Battle Royale is underway between the status quo and forces for Transformation.  I squarely place myself in the second camp.

Ignited by an article read years ago, I now claim such titles as Catalyst and Pioneer-Visionary.  Like a worker handling radioactive material, I don protective gear in the form of an invisible suit of armor while leading the charge to heal organizational toxicity.

Please join me in partnering to repair the torn threads of corporate ethics and personal integrity.  I invite your sharing with open arms!

I honestly pray that by the time my planned-112 years on Earth are at an end, everyone will be employed in workplaces where profit is realized as an outcome of treating people right rather than an all-consuming goal.  My commitment is bone-deep and never-wavering. 

Only then will the soul-wounding survived at the hands of so many dysfunctional leaders have been made worthwhile by being transmuted into a legacy of soul-inspiring leadership.

 

 

Filed Under: The Corporate Healer

What Is Class?

November 6, 2011 By Carol-Ann Leave a Comment

A Story That Makes the Point

There I was at an engagement – the featured keynote speaker as well as a panelist and workshop facilitator.  The opportunity was a conference to which influential and wealthy women were expressly invited by the convener.  I was honoured.

You can imagine in mounting even a six-hour event, much groundwork ensued behind the scenes.  These preparatory aspects entailed specific instructions about the day’s timing in order to stay on schedule.  Toward that end, panelists were sent our questions in advance so as to render succinct responses.  The unspoken purpose was to demonstrate respect for the four other women who would be offering their insights.

Despite the attention to detail intended to ensure a successful experience, what do you imagine happened?

Hardly had the moderator posed her first query than the individual in question proceeded to grab the microphone – even though another panelist had clearly raised her hand to go first.  Oblivious to the audience’s askanced looks, this woman launched into a five-minute monologue that can only be described as ignorant – all about her greatness and arrogant views that “the rules are not for me”.  As if she alone on Earth were exempt!

Wow.  My mouth hangs open still.  I was stunned.  I remain inflamed.

Why?  That one action alone displayed such cavalier disrespect for everyone in the room I can scarcely believe it to this day.  On top of it, her energy-vampire actions ultimately compromised the remaining agenda, as no one stepped forward in courageous leadership to stop her self-absorption in its tracks.

The Top Ten List

While processing these shocking behaviours up to my wrists in weeds and garden dirt afterwards, a whole article on “class” came to me so quickly, I kept coming indoors to record the insights on what is now a very scruffy scrap of paper.  Not a usual Top Ten List, may the alternating rhythms provoke deep contemplation in you:

True Class imparts wisdom when requested – always in service and love.

Fake Class foists opinion – unsolicited – for the purpose of self-gain.

True Class shines light upon others’ greatness – making them feel special.

Surface Class focuses singularly upon its own magnificence.

True Class accords space for authenticity of exchange – a safe truth-speaking refuge.

Low Class siphons others’ life force – shutting them down.

True Class knows its worth and walks with humility plus nobility of carriage.

No Class shores up its value through shameless self-promotion.

True Class stands in silent power – feet firmly planted in grace.

Shaky Class leans in on others – oblivious to impact and obsessed with its neediness.

Parting Reflections

If there were an over-arching conclusion at which I encourage you to arrive, it would be: True Class has nothing to do with outer wealth and everything to do with inner riches.

Interestingly, while composing this piece, I suddenly remembered a classic from Ann Landers’ Encyclopedia.  For decades, she served as a trusted source of advice via her U.S.newspaper column.  What do you think it was called?  That’s right!  “What Is Class?”

What an inspiration to reconnect with a meaningful piece that had enormously impressed me already as a child in the 1960’s.  Yes, that’s how far back we’re talking!  As you read along, I hope you will agree that class is indeed timeless.

"Class never runs scared. It is sure-footed and confident in the knowledge that you can meet life head on and handle whatever comes along."
"Class never makes excuses. It takes its lumps and learns from past mistakes."
"Class is considerate of others. It knows that good manners are nothing more than a series of small sacrifices."
"Class never tries to build itself up by tearing others down. Class is already up and need not strive to look better by making others look worse."
"Class can ‘walk with kings and keep its virtue and talk with crowds and keep the common touch.’ Everyone is comfortable with the person who has class because he is comfortable with himself."
"If you have class you don't need much of anything else. If you don't have it, no matter what else you have, it doesn't make much difference."
Well said, Ann!

Filed Under: Be Self Aware

Whatever Happened to “Common” Courtesy?

September 10, 2011 By Carol-Ann Leave a Comment

The Value of “Contrast”

Have you ever noticed that daily life provides multiple opportunities to experience what Esther and Jerry Hicks call in their fine work, Getting into the Vortex, “contrast”?  By this term, they mean that when others behave in ways contrary to our cherished values and principles, they (unintentionally) assist us to clarify what is right by us.

As such, one ought to be grateful for others’ “contrasting” attitudes and actions.  Without such “negative” experiences, The Hicks purport, we would not nearly know ourselves as well.  In other words, we need every relationship that exists around us, for everyone in our sphere constantly informs our own principles for living.

This tenet has been a theme in my writing on more than one occasion.  That’s because I accept it to be fully true.

Is Courtesy Common or Uncommon?

Boy, did this pivotal point ever come home to me big-time recently!

To set just enough – but not too much context to violate confidentiality – I recently followed through on a colleague’s recommendation to advance my name for a joint venture.  We were directed to contact a senior individual who carries a heavy workload.  

Who of us is not busy these days, however?  I sure don’t have the time to sit around and eat chocolates!

Thus, when I carved a pocket from my overwhelming schedule to pursue the lead, I expected to receive the “courtesy” of an acknowledgement.  We’re not talking an essay.  Just a one-liner to indicate my carefully-crafted but succinct message had been received.

In the face of expressed frustration over the lack of follow-up within my trusted network, people have generally said: “That’s just the way it is these days, Carol-Ann.  Get used to it.  Let it go.”  Never!

For, these same individuals recite their own irritated stories about co-workers who: don’t answer their phones (when able); avoid human interaction with someone sitting in the next cubicle; hide behind email.  All are supposedly “common” traits nowadays.  

The Top Ten List

And, what is courtesy but “good manners, polite or kind” (Oxford Dictionary)?  As we further investigate the subject, I encourage you to consider your responses to these questions on a scale from 1 (never) to 10 (always):

  1. When was the last time you prefaced a request with “please”?
  2. How often do you say “thank-you” when someone fulfills on your requests?
  3. Do you consciously think about your impact on the circles that surround you?
  4. If you’re too overwhelmed to deal with a colleague in person in the moment, do you negotiate an alternative time to do so?
  5. Do you contribute to endless CYA email-strings? (I think you know what this is!)
  6. When communicating unpopular information, do you keep others’ self-esteem intact?
  7. Even if you’re on deadline, do you acknowledge colleagues’ correspondence with an indication of when you’ll get back to them?
  8.  To what degree do you follow-through with an orientation toward service?  
  9. Are you too busy to be “nice”?
  10. Do you conclude that those who prefer a human touch are soft, weak or whiners?

Parting Reflections

If you’re right now thinking, I live on a different planet, I urge you to think again!

For, my recent experiences have caused me to worry (along with fellow authors, columnists and speakers) about what will happen to “common courtesy” as a result of two-thumbed and/or avoidant communication styles that somehow renders it OK to treat others with downright ignorance or rudeness.  I didn’t previously; I now do.

As a consequence, here’s my very-public commitment.  You have my absolute permission to call me out should these promises ever be broken:

  • To make the K chapter in The Next A to Z Guide to Soul-Inspiring Leadership (in production) stand for Kindness (you can be sure I shall be making the “business case” for treating others right);
  • To always make time for people – no matter how “big” I personally get;
  • To never fall prey to this recent exchange between the pointy-haired boss and Alice, drawn from Scott Adams’ famed “Dilbert” cartoon.  (There’s a reason Adams strikes such a familiar chord.)

Boss: I’m just stopping by to say you’re doing a great job, Alice.

Alice: You never do that!  It’s a trick!  Die, monster, die!

Boss (declared to Dogbert): I might have a credibility issue

Filed Under: Back to Business

Enlighten & Enliven

June 29, 2011 By Carol-Ann Leave a Comment

The Facilitator’s Life

Is each day a whirlwind? Do countless competing demands rule your calendar? It wouldn’t be surprising to hear you put groups, colleagues, friends and family first. Rendering you last…

Yet, “to facilitate” means “to make easy or less difficult or more easily achieved” (Oxford English Reference Dictionary). Begging the question – what are we as facilitators doing to smooth our own lives?

Are You Alive or Lively?

Those inspired by a mission or cause tend to assume multi-tasking enables us to endlessly juggle myriad responsibilities without consequence.

Not true! We must instead practice extreme self-care. Does this sound self-indulgent? If so, remember the airline adage to don your oxygen mask during crisis. In this case, the “emergency” is your sustained ability to perform your important contributions.

Bringing us to a key distinction… “Liveliness” refers to vigorous and energetic. “Aliveness” in turn encompasses “living, not dead”.

Do you choose to be merely alive – or full of life?

The Opportunity

If you want lively, step off your “crazy busy” treadmill and reflect on what’s really important. Now! As Rainer Maria Rilke’s proposes: “There is only one journey; going inside.”

Here – some encouragements I offer at wellness conferences, team-building retreats and personal growth workshops:

Examine your thoughts. We’re said to have 60,000 thoughts per day. Be watchful. You literally create your reality.

Name what blocks you. Is fear or doubt a familiar companion? Get beneath how you sabotage success and heal your wounded recesses.

Identify daily energizers. Brainstorm enhancing activities in two, five, fifteen and half-hour increments. Pinpoint tolerations (energy drains in your environment, work, relationships, finances, etc). Vow to eliminate them.

Further, notice how your inner wisdom responds to these invitations to summon connection to your deeper calling:

1. I am most myself when __________________________________.

2. My mission needs the quality of ______________________________ from me.

3. I would like to change in the world __________________________________.

The Call to Action

You know, up to three years ago, I was seriously joy-challenged. The last person who should teach “let go and lighten up” J

As such, Buckminster Fuller’s term, “precession”, makes perfect sense. It denotes a series of small steps leading to an astonishing, unforeseen conclusion.

Though many would love to imagine otherwise, uncovering your liveliness isn’t an overnight phenomenon. Across 52 years so far, expansion has been measured by my courageous willingness to uproot beliefs and attitudes which no longer support my higher purpose. Such “scouring” isn’t necessarily easy but always worthwhile.

In closing, let me ask: Why do you continue your work? Without knowing you (yet), I gather facilitation expresses part of Who You Really Are. You’re undoubtedly a “guiding light” who invokes transformation through personal example.

To support your passionate bravery, William Barkley writes: “There are two great days in a person’s life – when we are born and we discover why.” Joseph Campbell adds: “When you follow your bliss, doors will open where you would not have thought there were doors.”

The world awaits you.

Filed Under: Back to Business

“Love” in the Workplace

May 12, 2011 By Carol-Ann Leave a Comment

What’s “Love” Got to Do With It?

Did you know there’s a body of thought that suggests we have only two ways-of-being – Love or Fear?  This holds true whether at work, at home or anywhere.  Fear can include hate, despair, cynicism, blame and apathy.  Conversely, Love in an organizational context (also called “loving kindness”) has to do with looking past others’ “foibles” and instead seeing them in their essence.

Practically-speaking, these behaviours show up all the time in training programs on Communication Skills, encouraging us to step into others’ shoes.  Yet, how many of us fail to do even that?  So preoccupied by the conversation inside our own heads, we have almost zero capacity to listen to what others are really saying (or not saying).

Perhaps we ought to take a page from my friend’s book.  Never have I met anyone so committed to understanding (and loving) people.  Tony is like a dog with a bone.  It may take a while, but he chips away at the outer “protective layers” until he’s managed to locate himself in your interior.  Not offensively – but gently.  His artfulness in looking at the world exactly as you would is second to none.  And, it starts with his profound dedication to “get” his colleagues and friends alike.

The Transformational Possibilities

As we stand at the hopeful brink of renewal, authors like Marianne Williamson (The Gift of Change: Spiritual Guidance for a Radically New Life) acknowledge life as we knew it is passing away.  All of us are part of a much larger process.

Williamson goes farther by asserting the planet’s progress depends upon a quantum leap within each of us.  This means deliberately letting go of limiting attitudes and actions (Fear) in our work and personal lives so a much-needed transition toward Love can occur around the globe.

The great news is, we control our own willingness to craft our everyday interactions so they’re based in unconditional Love.  With Tony’s to teach us, my optimism grows.  Does yours?

The Top Ten List

As usual, I invite you to scour your heart in responding to these thought-provoking questions:

  1. What attitudes/behaviours do you demonstrate when coming from Love?
  2. What proportion of your energy is spent in Love versus Fear?
  3. How conditional versus unconditional is your love?
  4. With what kinds of people is it easier to extend loving kindness?
  5. In what situations is it difficult for you to be your loving best?
  6. How open are you to changing your Fear-based attitudes and/or behaviours?
  7. What benefits could result from projecting loving energy wherever you go?
  8. How do you think those “annoying” others might start to react or act differently if you were to practice these new ways of being?
  9. Ask yourself how you can avoid retreating into disappointment or other emotions when others fail to live up to your expectations.
  10. What do you think of the idea our human progress depends upon our individual ability to love (rather than be in fear)?

Parting Reflections

Here’s your stretch exercise.  For a period of time you select, extend loving kindness where you go.  Up the ante and send the most Love toward those who bug you most!  Then decide if you wish to make the ‘experiment’ permanent.  If you’d appreciate some inspiration, take your cue from these loving role models:
“People are unreasonable, illogical and self – centered.  Love them ANYWAY.  The good you do today will be forgotten tomorrow.  Be good ANYWAY.”(Mother Teresa)

“Along the way in life, someone must have sense enough and morality enough to cut off the chain of hate.  This can only be done by projecting the ethic of love to the center of our lives.”(Dr. Martin Luther King Jr.)

Filed Under: Back to Business

The Times Are Changing

May 12, 2011 By Carol-Ann Leave a Comment

Back to School

As the “hazy, lazy, crazy days of summer” come to an end, you’ll likely be experiencing your own version of the back-to-school energy that so colours this season across North America.

A number of you may have children or students returning to the classroom or university.  Others have graduates establishing themselves in the workplace.  And, certain readers will be considering what studies are next for you.  Either way, I hope you’re entertaining some ideas about how to grow and develop across the fall – including how you can apply your special talents to positively changing a situation at (and/or outside of) work…
Continuous Improvement Is a Mindset

Taking our cue from nature, She inherently knows not to stay in one state for any length of time, but rather to continuously unfold.  May I suggest how critical it is in business to follow Her lead?

For, I’m sure your workplace represents the “new normal” of trying to keep ahead of (or at least apace with) hyper-speed operating conditions plus super-intense customer and marketplace expectations.  Ongoing upheaval is the daily name of the game.  In such an aggressive climate, it would be extremely easy to see ourselves as victims – tossed around on the raging seas without so much as an oar to direct the ship.

As a result, a “woe-is-me” mindset is very understandable when faced with constant revolution.  All I’m asking is: Can we agree it wouldn’t eventually be an influential stance?  What if, instead, you were to choose a proactive frame of mind where you seek out opportunities to tweak, enhance or even dramatically alter some aspect of how you navigate your day?  This could involve process improvement or shifting your roles and responsibilities.  How would such an upbeat attitude affect your sense of control?  I’d have to suspect positively!  In so doing, you’re seizing the reins of power over your work.

The Top Ten List

Yes, the active decision to take charge of every part of your life is really a way of being.  But it needs to be a way you adopt.  You must consciously determine whether you want to feel like “they” are forever doing it “to you” or whether you want to own your career.  Like it or not, you’re in command of the cards you play.

You get to choose, for you’re responsible for your life.  In that sense, I encourage you to consider this month’s Top Ten list as my challenge to possibly one of more of your thoughts or opinions about change and what is called in customer-driven quality circles “continuous improvement”:

  1. You choose your perspective (about change or any subject) at every moment – whether you do this deliberately or by default.
  2. Decide for yourself if upheaval is to be feared or relished; it’s up to you.
  3. Resolve whether change needs to feel painful or whether it teaches you lessons that make you stronger.
  4. Change is continuous; it never ends.
  5. Change is neither good nor bad; it just is.
  6. Allow that resistance is a (first) very natural and human response.  It’s OK to experience your feelings when stressed (and any time, actually).
  7. Grant yourself permission to not always enjoy being moved out of comfort zones.
  8. Recognize that every change (even a beneficial one) costs somebody something.
  9. Everyone has their own speed for coming to terms with new situations.
  10. Allow for the endings and losses which change produces – for failure to do so will negatively lengthen moving through your difficult emotions.

Parting Reflections

In promoting a productive attitude toward upheaval in business (and life), my hope is you will reframe your reality by choosing to see change as natural and constant.  Rather than be overwhelmed, how about holding it as a chance to grow and renew?

What if absence of change was a sign of stagnation?  Back to today’s and tomorrow’s workplace, I’m sure you see how negativity like “It’s not my problem” or “Everybody else can change, but I don’t have to” won’t get you very far.

For today, let me leave you with these inspirations from great leaders:

“Change is the law of life.  And those who look only to the past or present are certain to miss the future.” (John F. Kennedy)
“Personally I’m always ready to learn, although I do not always like being taught.” (Sir Winston Churchill)
“There are those who look at things as they are, and ask why.  I dream of things that never were, and ask why not?” (Robert Kennedy)

Filed Under: Back to Business

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