Carol-Ann, Author at Spirit Unlimited

Removing the Winter Cobwebs

May 12, 2011 By Carol-Ann Leave a Comment

Time to Shed the Layers

Yes, it’s time for Part One of spring cleaning. Are you ready? Let’s start by identifying ways you remain stuck – so you can ultimately let go of what holds you back. “All” it takes is willingness plus openness to get rid of anything (people, viewpoints, things or situations) misaligned with the direction you now choose to chart your life.

Comfortable Versus Comfort Zone

First things first – we should distinguish the critical difference between being comfortable versus being stuck inside a comfort zone. When we’re comfortable, the values, perspectives and practices that comprise our daily routine generally serve our aims. They support our dreams, resulting in a level of ease inside our own skin.

On the other hand, once life gets to feeling a little too cozy or familiar, you’ve likely slipped into a comfort zone (often unbeknownst to you). What was once a productive mindset becomes a self-created jail. Imprisoned, your comfort zone renders you lazy. You justify it’s better to play it safe than to step out toward the great unknown. You’re trapped into what some call your default setting – the threshold to which you endlessly return that constricts what’s possible for you.

As Dr. Joe Vitale confirms in Expect Miracles, the problem is that our unconscious boundaries act as protective walls around us. They cap what we can accomplish and sabotage our attempts to reach beyond this artificial imposed ceiling. Two of the strongest self-limiting beliefs you will combat are fear of failure (understandable) and fear of success (surprising). You become afraid to stride past your barriers, even if you say you want to. As a result, you relinquish any progress you do make and risk to never see your goals materialize.

The Top Ten List

The good news is, you possess full power to create the momentum it takes to lift up from your comfort zone. Anyone who has studied physics knows it takes more energy to set an object into motion than it does to keep it moving. If you can generate enough “steam”, you’ll stay on a roll. Then, it’s a matter of deliberate practice where even a step a day will move you forward faster than you can imagine.

To help you remain consistent and persistent in your commitment to get on with your life, here’s some food for thought:

In what ways is your life a comfort zone (and not merely comfortable)?
How can you tell you’ve crossed the line from comfortable to comfort zone?
What are some ways you imprison yourself?
What factors cause you to turn your life into a jail-like comfort zone?
Then, why do you continue to limit yourself from venturing forth?
Do you limit yourself more out of fear of success or fear of failure? Expand your answer for yourself.
What is staying stuck costing you?
How is staying safe benefitting you (because it is)?
To step out of your comfort zone, what inner qualities do you need to strengthen?
On a scale of 1 to 10, how ready are you to let go of what’s not working in your life? If your answer is anything less than an 8, what’s required to bump it up?

Parting Reflections

Remember – comfort unto itself is not a bad thing. Once you’ve slid into a too-comfortable zone, though, it’s time to step out. Along with continuing to reflect on how you can tell the difference between these two ends of the spectrum for yourself, I offer a short extract from a longer poem entitled “Letting Go” (authorship unknown) to encourage you to keep releasing.

To “let go” is not to adjust everything to my desiresBut to take each day as it comes, and cherish myself in itTo “let go” is not to criticize and regulate anybodyBut to try to become what I dream I can be

To “let go” is to not regret the past

But to grow and live for the future

Taking Care of Fall Maintenance

May 12, 2011 By Carol-Ann Leave a Comment

Being Versus Doing

If ever there was a season when we risk getting whipped into frenzy, it’s autumn. Now’s the time to practice balancing active achievement (doing) and introspection (being) – so you maintain ample reserves going into winter. These two “energies” in harmony keep you dynamic. Out of sync, you become stressed from too much on your plate.

Especially in North America, equilibrium is vital. Yes, the “hurry up sickness” that characterizes our daily professional and personal worlds has become common-place; it’s virtually unquestioned. Feeling stuck on a never-ending treadmill, many get trapped in constant doing. We forget we’re here to have a ‘human experience’ (not to mention humane). Not the other way around!

Extreme Self-Care

In coaching, we use the term extreme self-care to describe this critical need for regular renewal. I know, as soon as they hear it, many clients jump to the (false) conclusion the term means “selfish”. Not so! It simply refers to caring for yourself, if you’re to be of service to others. When you continuously put everyone first, isn’t this a surefire recipe for burnout?

Why do you think airlines encourage you to put on your own emergency oxygen mask before assisting a fellow passenger? Because if you don’t, you may die before rescuing the next person! By extension, making time for your nurturing – first and foremost – results in you being more present (i.e., available) to your loved ones, friends and colleagues. On the other hand, when you forever sacrifice your very-legitimate needs, they feel it through your bubbling resentment.

The Top Ten List

At this point, are you intrigued by the possibilities extreme self-care offers? I wish so! But I also understand if you’re wondering where and how to start.

The answer is both simple and complex. You decide to free your self. You create your own permission. Others won’t necessarily grant it. After all, if you’re not strong enough internally to dedicate some portion of your day to just you, how can you expect external leeway? If anything, others may try to blame you – because they feel too guilty to make time for themselves!

Here’s my Top Ten list for remembering my center – in the hopes it helps you generate yours:

Breathe!
Take walks.
Play with our cats J
Listen to music.
Take a bubble bath.
Enjoy the corner of my office decorated with objects that calm mind and spirit.
Engage in journaling and reflection – if even for 5, 10 or 15 minutes a day.
Begin and end each day with an expression of gratitude.
Make choices around what’s important using both my head and heart.
Learn to say no to involvements that aren’t aligned with what I value.

Parting Reflections

In case you conclude I find it easy to dole out all this advice, think again. Like you, I struggle to stay connected to my interior. Like you, I need to consistently remember to set aside opportunities for activities that nourish me.

I’m now looking upon self-care as oxygen…a matter of survival. I now choose to fiercely tend my priorities (what Stephen Covey calls the “Big Rocks”). The pursuit of busyness no longer gets to override the people and commitments MOST important to me. They go in my calendar first!

How about you? On a scale of 1 (low) to 10 (high), how ready are you to place your self-care ahead of the countless demands that compete for your attention?
“Until one is committed, there is hesitancy, the chance to draw back, always ineffectiveness. Concerning all acts of initiative and creation, there is one elementary truth, the ignorance of which kills countless ideas and splendid plans…The moment one definitely commits oneself, then Providence moves too. All sorts of things occur to help one that would never otherwise have occurred. A whole stream of events issues from the decision, raising in one’s favor all manner of unforeseen incidents and meetings and material assistance which no man could have dreamed would have come his way. Whatever you can do or dream you can do, begin it. Boldness has genius, power, and magic in it. Begin it now!” (Goethe)

How Did You Leave Them Feeling?

May 11, 2011 By Carol-Ann Leave a Comment

How Do You Walk in the World?

“Did you leave a trail of kindness behind you today?” Ever since a colleague shared this wonderful phrase, it has become a guiding light. Think about it. If we were to engage with everyone this way, wouldn’t our time here be well-lived?

Because, whether we care to admit it or not, we always know who we’re being on the inside – deep down. About both the visible and invisible moments of truth (when nobody is looking), Jon Kabat Zinn reminds us, “no matter where you go, there you are.” Yes, it is a choice whether to leave a trail of kindness or destruction in your wake.

It’s About Your Personal Leadership

And, personal leadership has nothing to do with your title or job responsibilities. You can be a CEO or President without acquiring followers. Or, you can hold a non-managerial title and yet engage everyone by walking your talk.

So, what creates the magic? The answer lies in your personal integrity, vision and values. Position power doesn’t cut it. Personal power does. It’s about the all-important “how”. Sure, you can achieve a great “what” (i.e. results) but if these come at the cost of beleaguered colleagues and toxic interactions, you’d have to question the ultimate accomplishment. No?

The Top Ten List

More specifically, personal leadership is about uplifting others and igniting their enthusiasm. It’s about consistently living your principles. It’s about accountability for how you walk in the world.

So, here’s my invitation: Please consider this Top Ten list as the secrets for being an inspiring personal leader in business and in life.

Be authentic. Drop your masks. Model openness and sincerity.
Accept that “how we really are around here” starts with you.
Think of yourself as a “servant” to others rather than “what’s in it for me”.
Build relationships by making time to get to know people as individuals.
Bring out the best in others by recognizing their unique talents and gifts.
Catch your team mates doing something right – not wrong.
Be courageous and engage in tough conversations by fostering truth-telling.
Ask questions to understand – not to ram your views down others’ throats.
Even when disagreeing, find sources of commonality.
Remember what’s really important in life by maintaining a sense of balance…for not even the most entrenched workaholic wishes they had worked more on their deathbed.

Parting Reflections

We stand at a hugely transformational time in history. Imagine what could happen across the planet if we listened with a generosity that dignifies the individual. What forces for good could be unleashed if we promoted one another’s self-actualization? All is possible when we encourage others’ vast potential – mining their in-born wisdom.

The way I see to tap into this powerful time is to become that personal leader who transforms the workplace by leaving a trail of kindness wherever you go. Each of us is 100% responsible for our impact on others. Remember…people will forget a lot of what you tell them, but they will never forget how you made them feel.

Until next time, let me leave you with a parting question that may make all the difference in the path you forge from today forward:

What if you considered every interaction with the people in your life to be your last? How would that thought change the quality of your relationships?

Continuing the Spring Renewal

May 3, 2011 By Carol-Ann Leave a Comment

Questioning Yourself

If you were to tell me you’re having some challenges letting go, I’d understand. For, in all honesty, I don’t enjoy practicing new behaviours – at first. Several reasons account for this resistance. One ties to how adults learn.

In my field of training and development – along one axis of a four-part grid – we’re either “Competent” or “Incompetent” in terms of skills, abilities and knowledge. The other axis refers to being either “Conscious” or “Unconscious”. We’re Consciously Competent when aware of what we do well (and why) and Unconsciously Competent when we don’t realize these things. Competence is comfortable.

Yet, when it comes time to step out of old zones, you need to move from Competent to Incompetent. As feelings of frustration arise over how difficult new behaviours are, you wonder, “Can I pull this off?” Then doubt kicks into overdrive and you start thinking, “What if I mess up?” Ah, the unsettling pangs of what if, what if, what if…

Ready to take the plunge, you must not lose faith in yourself. For when you do, you open the door to a downward spiral. If you constantly give in and give up, you’ll never conquer your demons. Remember what we said some time ago about the Gremlin? Doubt is one of its most common manifestations. It mustn’t be paid heed.

If anything, doubtful feelings are a good sign you’re attempting to stretch. Slowly, you will turn from Conscious Incompetent to Conscious Competent and return to Unconscious Competent. This is when you’re no longer even aware you’ve crossed the line. You know how to step out but don’t even realize what’s contributing to your success. Walking away from comfort zones has become a ‘natural’ behaviour.

And, the more you exercise these “muscles”, the more wins you’ll have. Then, you can use those breakthroughs to give “oomph” to more risks. In the end, you just have to do it. While I intensely dislike this phrase, it makes a lot of sense when stepping out of stale energies in the form of people or situations.

The Top Ten List

As Oprah’s “What I Know For Sure” (March 2009) encourages, allow the new life of spring to awaken in you. And, whatever your challenge let it be an open door to your most significant revelations about yourself – an invitation to your best life. To both entice you to step into a world of possibilities and to clear out what no longer serves, here are this month’s reflective inquiry questions mixed with some tangible action items for those of you who like “practical assignments”:

What options have you been cutting off by staying stuck?
What are you ready to do to overcome fears about forging into unfamiliar territory so as to increase the number of new possibilities you allow yourself?
How can you shift those places in your life where you’re Consciously Incompetent?
In what areas are you Consciously Competent? How can you strengthen these?
How can you keep at your efforts even if you fail at first? Said another way, what can you do to ensure you don’t lose faith as you take the plunge?
What critical factors contribute to your best learning? What strategies can you use from successful situations so you’re not stopped by self-questioning?
Recycle by going through old magazines, books or catalogues and getting rid of them. Bring the magazines to a doctor’s office, hair salon or health club. Donate books to your local library or place of worship for an upcoming sale.
Trade your treasures by hosting a “give-away” party where attendees bring clothes, jewelry, household items, etc. to swap with one another. Each person should find a treasure in others’ lots and it could make for a fun social to boot!
Donate by going through your old clothes or household items with an eye for sharing the wealth with those in need. Your old suits or dresses could give someone a new outfit for a job interview.
Recycle by going through your office files and contact list – letting go of outdated resources, emails, information or old ideas. Make space for great opportunities or more creative ideas that make sense for who you are now.

Parting Reflections

For your Action Exercise, let’s see what happens if you commit over the next 30 days to “doing the opposite”. This means, in every area of your life, do the opposite of your typical actions and emotions. If you’re apt to get angry in any given situation, stay calm. If you’re frustrated by certain people, see them in their essence and stay unfrazzled. Remain open, looking for as many instances as you can to practice these new behaviours. At month’s end, check in and ask yourself what it felt like to do the opposite. Where was it easy to do this exercise and where was it hard? Are there any ways-of-being you would like to maintain, going forward?

To return to Cherie Carter-Scott, I hope this quote will leave you intrigued until we next meet: “Ordinary people believe only in the possible. Extraordinary people visualize not what is possible or probable, but rather what is impossible. And by visualizing the impossible, they begin to see it as possible.”

How “Lucky” Are You?

May 3, 2011 By Carol-Ann Leave a Comment

About the Shamrock

One of the oldest Celtic symbols, this three-leafed gem was revered in Victorian times for its medicinal qualities. To many throughout the ages, it has represented past, present and future. Today, we prize the shamrock’s quintessential good luck meaning. Just listen to Irish blessings oft- repeated: “May the road rise to meet you. May the wind be always at your back. May the sun warm upon your face.”

Is It Luck or Success?

Well-intended as they may be, these sayings subtly suggest our fate resides in the hands of outside forces that either decide to rain or smile upon us. So, why not just surrender the power to direct our lives?

On the other side of the fence, reside opposing believers like Einstein, who is famously known for asserting: “Luck is when preparation meets opportunity.” According to Albert, we must seize the reins of control and make our own “luck” happen through the application of our skills and talent.

To compound matters, when we turn to current thought leaders, we learn from Malcolm Gladwell in his 2008 best-seller The Outliers a fascinating blueprint for making the most of human potential. For instance, one of his more provocative theses is the requirement for 10,000 hours of practice (roughly ten years) to attain the “magic number of greatness” in any profession. It seems it takes the brain this long to assimilate all it needs to achieve true mastery.

Then, there are Cherie Carter-Scott’s “rules” in If Success Is a Game, These Are the Rules. In her 2000 volume, she reveals each person has their own definition of success – an individualized version of what it means to be fulfilled. There is no universal description. No wonder things get complicated!

What Is Stopping You?

Carter-Scott goes on to state that wanting success and self-trust are key ingredients to attaining it. However, if it were as simple as that, we’d all presumably be “successful” by our own standards.

Here’s where we start to butt up against all manner of blocks. Blocks can include negative self-talk, limiting beliefs and fears of risk-taking. Ironically, the number one reason success becomes derailed is self-sabotage. Had you ever considered that if you’ve been thinking of yourself as a “failure” and you now become successful, you’ll need to change your identity? True. This point is not as obvious as it first appears.

Yes, all setbacks provide valuable lessons. There will be inevitable disappointments and perceived failures along the way. Learning from these experiences offers precious insights that lead to future milestones.

And, even if you reach success (on your terms) every new level brings unexpected challenges. Each accomplishment alters your reality, either slightly or dramatically. As such, success is a process that never ends. Once you’ve reach the so-called top, there’s a new peak to embrace.

The Top Ten List

To change up things a little, I entice you to respond to this list of 10 fill-in-the-blanks. Don’t over-think your answers. Complete the statements with your first response:

1) For me, success means ____________________________________________.

2) The people I view as successful are __________________________________.

3) I feel successful when I ____________________________________________.

4) I will feel like a success when I ______________________________________. (different from #3)

5) My symbols of success are __________________________________________.

6) The barriers I need to overcome are ___________________________________.

7) The actions I’m called to take include __________________________________.

8) The people who will be happy over my success are _______________________.

9) The people who will not be pleased over my success are ___________________.

10) I defined myself in the past as _______________________. I define myself in the present as _______________________________. I want to define myself in the future as ____________________________________________________.

Parting Reflections

To borrow from Cherie Carter-Scott a last time, the process of moving to “I have everything I dreamed of” has five distinct steps:

Step One: “I don’t know what I want and I can’t be it, do it, or have it.”

Step Two: “I know what I want, but I can’t have it.”

Step Three: “I know what I want and I can have some of it.”

Step Four: “I know what I want and I can have it all.”

Step Five: “I have what I want.”

As your unofficial coach, this information leads to these follow-up questions:

Where do you place yourself on this spectrum of steps right now?
Where do you want to be?
What’s it going to take to get you there?

Finally, you get to decide for yourself whether my parting wish is a mark of success or luck: “May the best day of your past be the worst day of your future.”

Returning to Yourself

May 3, 2011 By Carol-Ann Leave a Comment

“Our deepest fear is not that we are inadequate. Our deepest fear is that we are powerful beyond measure. It is our light, not our darkness, which frightens us. We ask ourselves, who am I to be brilliant, gorgeous, talented, and fabulous? Actually, who are you not to be? Your playing small doesn’t serve the world. There’s nothing enlightened about shrinking so that other people won’t feel insecure around you. As we let our light shine, we unconsciously give other people permission to do the same. As we are liberated from our own fear, our presence automatically liberates others.” (Marianne Williamson, A Return to Love)

Your Authentic Self

Let me then start by asking: Who do you bring to work each day? Do others get the full you, or do you shelve some part of yourself when you head out the door? Important questions! For, authenticity in corporate life has to do with offering your unique gifts and talents to others and encouraging them to do the same. As you commit to unveiling your real self, you inspire others to undergo their own emergence. If even one person bumps up their voltage, everyone is enabled to bring greater clarity to work.

As Marianne Williamson’s quote attests, you already are all that you seek. Your yearned-for qualities are part of you, not separate. As such, your journey in life is about uncovering plus reclaiming ‘Who You Really Are’ (i.e., your essential joy, creativity and possibility). It’s not about trying to become somebody else.

Personal Mastery

Couple authenticity with what science is now proving. Namely, our thoughts create our reality. In addition, what we focus on expands. Given we have about 45,000 thousand thoughts per day (some even suggest 60,000), can you imagine the electricity unleashed if all of us were to focus our power on positivity in the workplace?

I believe it’s Einstein who speculated that even the most advanced thought leaders of our time tap only 2% of their potential. Wow! If it’s true (and it is) that people constantly pick up on the energy you emit, what frequency do you broadcast daily? Does your ‘signal’ align with what you want to attract into your life and what you want to offer to others in the business context surrounding you?

The Top Ten List

Yes, we come back to the repeated message: Change begins with us. Isn’t it Gandhi who declared, “Be the change you wish to see in the world”? If so, then this involves turning the mirror of examination once again upon ourselves.

Therefore, please consider this month’s Top Ten list as my set of provocations asking you to reflect upon your authenticity plus how you demonstrate personal mastery.

To what extent do you live according to your inner truth?
How would you describe your authentic self (values, needs, motivations)?
To what degree do you bring your best self to work?
How much of your time do you spend in negativity versus optimism?
Do you stop during the day to notice what you’re thinking and feeling?
Do you regularly examine your behavior plus impact on others?
Are you prepared to release self-imposed restrictions that no longer serve you?
To what extent are you prepared to upset the status quo?
What messages from your past are standing in the way of your unique destiny?
Are you ready to reclaim your true power?

Parting Reflections

As a new era dawns around the globe, evidence of people’s quest for renewal is to be found everywhere. It’s located, for example, in a burgeoning interest to discover and create lives of individual meaning and purpose.

In this sense, it becomes vital to create nurturing spaces where we can listen to the still voice within that invites us to step into our bigger purpose on the planet. In so doing, we gain new understanding that allows us to reclaim, integrate and celebrate our Authentic Self.

Another way to “unleash your spirit” is to engage in fill-in-the-blank exercises of the sort that follow. Enjoy!

I am _____________.
I keep being drawn to ___________.
I shine when ____________.
I would like to change in the world _________.

Inner Facial, Anyone?

May 2, 2011 By Carol-Ann Leave a Comment

Outward Facial Benefits

By no means an esthetics expert, I learned in perusing some free flyers that a professional facial promotes complexion clarity and noticeably glowing skin. A proper treatment offers the additional benefits of deep cleansing, increased circulation and stimulated skin. Thus, it can help slow premature aging by custom-targeting your skin care.

Fatigued by my life of details (a term borrowed from the movie, “The Bridges of Madison County”, for those who’ve seen it), I can attest to all these outcomes – and more – as a result of recently investing part of an afternoon within a spa-oasis. Ahhh……..

Inner Cleansing Benefits

You know how strongly I advocate for extreme self-care – or making regular time for our renewal. My facial plus massage (OK, I admit it!) certainly fit one half of the bill. Even more powerful than outer beautification, in my mind though, are the results of devoting time to our inner “cleansing”.

This brings us to a term I coined around 1999, if you can imagine. Have you ever wondered what a Spiritual Beauty Consultant ™ does? It means: “A guide (consultant) who helps you make everyday life beautiful (beauty) by nurturing your inner core (spiritual).” It’s about reclaiming and integrating your True Self (Who You Really Are) into your broader mission on Earth.

The word, spirit, derives from the Latin spirare, to breathe. Our breath literally animates us. As we stay connected to our essence, we weave a sense of purpose into the very fabric of daily life.
Beauty is about finding joy, wonder and enthusiasm in the so-called “small things”. In noticing the beauty of every day, we transform ordinary events into extraordinary occurrences.
Consultancy involves creating an environment that emboldens people to reach their dreams and live their passions. (This mindset is reflective of how I work with my coaching clients to strengthen them in generating and implementing personalized solutions to their challenges.)

If you think about it, nothing prevents you from adopting the (inner) S.B.C. attitude of finding the beauty in everyday life!

I’m sure we’ve all been exposed to the idea that our external appearance absolutely mirrors what transpires within our interiors. We likely know individuals who are chronologically “old” but outwardly young. On the other hand, we may conjure up folks who haven’t lived long, but whose demeanour resembles that of an elderly person.

The Top Ten List

For these reasons, this article’s Top 10 List is focused upon a set of reflective coaching questions designed to promote inner beautification that cannot help but show in your external world:

When was the last time you treated yourself to nurturing (a spa facial, massage or other pampering treatment)? [This one is about your openness to granting time singularly to your well-being – back to extreme self-care.]
What (healthy) practices do you choose to engage in to achieve “noticeably glowing skin” [and I don’t necessarily mean eating right or exercising]?
How often do you think nourishing thoughts?
What kind of mental “cleansing” is required to rid yourself of anything that prevents you from standing in your True Self?
To what extent do you see and/or look for the beauty in every day?
What kind of “exfoliation” (removal of that which clogs pores) is required in terms of negative people or situations in your life?
What under-the-surface emotions or feelings would you say your face (or perhaps body language) is expressing?
Do you listen when your body speaks? What’s your physicality trying to tell you?
What’ stopping you from engaging in a pleasurable pursuit or activity you’ve been meaning to try?
Is it time to start or resume working with professional resources to help you take better care of your outer and/or inner “appearance”?

Parting Reflections

I kid you not! Amongst those mailbox brochures, one catalogue advertised a Self-Esteem Neck Firming Lift. Now I had heard everything…Self-Esteem in a bottle! May I suggest that beauty created “from the inside out” is likely more lasting than a topically-applied agent whose life-span is on the order of hours?

Remember these anonymous words: “A young girl asks a wise old woman, ‘How does one become a butterfly?’ With a twinkle in her eye, the old woman replies, ‘You must be willing to give up being a caterpillar.’”

Getting Rid of Distractions

May 2, 2011 By Carol-Ann Leave a Comment

Goal-Setting 101

Do you lack a clear approach or desire to start moving in the direction of your dreams. Let’s go there next in the form of some “standard” steps to follow:

Decide what you want. Brainstorm ten goals you’d like to achieve in the coming year. From your list, ask yourself: What one goal, if I were to accomplish it, would have the greatest impact on my life?
Write it down – clearly and in detail. A goal that isn’t in writing isn’t a goal at all. It’s merely a wish and has no energy behind it.
Set a deadline. A deadline acts as a “forcing system” in your subconscious mind. It motivates you to do the things necessary to make your goal come true.
Make a list. Itemize everything you can think to do to achieve your goal. As you come up with new tasks/activities, add them to your list.
Organize your list. Writing out your plan is like developing a blueprint to build your dream house.
Prioritize. Highly productive people work steadily and smoothly – rather than waste time and risk to siphon their efforts through low value activities.
Take action. Do something related to your goal each and every day – even if it feels minor. Maintain the momentum!

Develop a Sense of Urgency

When you work on high value tasks at a continuous level of focus, you can enter into an astonishing mental state called “flow.” At this highest performance state, you function on a higher plane of clarity, creativity and competence – often coming up with brilliant ideas that enable you to move ahead rapidly.

Developing a sense of urgency is one way to trigger flow. Urgency is about an inner drive to get on with things. It’s an impatience that motivates you to get and keep going. And, it’s a commitment to make your heart-felt desires come true, no matter what.

The Top Ten List

There! Easy as pie, right? You’ve got the goal-setting steps and know how important urgency is. So, you’re all set. Good luck with gathering the harvest of your dreams!

What’s that you’re saying? “Not so fast, Carol-Ann. If it were that simple, I’d have already done it by now.” OK, I admit to playing with you a bit. It’s to make the point that overcoming procrastination or other ways you stop yourself cold is not quite so basic. That’s why this issue’s Top Ten list is aimed at setting you up for success to manifest and reap what is rightfully yours:

Gather all the information and materials you need to do your goal-setting.
Clear your work space so it’s free of competing “demands” for your attention.
Make your work area as comfortable and attractive as possible.
Assume the body language of high performance. Sit up straight.
Adopt the attitude of “let’s get going!” and resolve to plunge in.
Consider what support you need from others to be successful.
Honour your personal limits. Do not over-extend yourself – even on meaningful “work” like moving forward with your life. When you’re done any one sitting (for, this will take more than one), stop for the day.
Try to keep scratching off your list those activities that drain your energy or take away concentration from manifesting your dreams.
Have some fun with this process!
Celebrate and reward yourself for keeping your promise to self to stay dedicated.

Here’s an interesting related factoid:

It has been estimated that the tendency to start and stop a task, to pick it up, put it down and come back to it can increase the time necessary to complete the task by as much as 500%. On the other hand, the ability to work single-handedly and with focus on a task can reduce the time to complete it by as much as 50%.

Parting Reflections

So, do you now see how any “clutter” really resides between your ears? You’re the only one standing in the way of having whatever you want.

Until we reconnect, I hope you’ll treat your further “dates” with yourself to pursue your harvest with as much respect as you would an important business appointment. Toward that end, I encourage you to keep a Time Log for the next month – not the type you’re expected to keep at work to record every 15 minutes but directed at carving out ample blocks or slots to accomplish your goals. If at month’s end, you haven’t given yourself enough attention physically, emotionally, mentally and spiritually, what can you do to re-apportion your time to be in greater harmony with your deepest needs and values?

The best question of all is: “What is the most valuable use of my time right now?” It will do more to keep you on track, hour by hour, than any other single question.

Claiming Your Power

May 2, 2011 By Carol-Ann Leave a Comment

You Make a Difference

Can you agree that each of us possesses huge (untapped) capacity to actively direct the course of our individual and collective lives?

If you’re doubtful, just look at how one person can significantly alter global events. Think Gandhi. Think Guttenberg – inventor of the printing press – or Edison. Now, some of you may be thinking we can’t all invent light bulbs! That’s true. Then again, maybe not all of us were cut out to.

What we are responsible for is to fully embrace our unique power. Unfortunately, many of us allow the “what I do can’t possibly matter” mindset to silently creep into our daily thinking. How many of you believe your election ballet counts? How soon would a park look and smell different if every visitor left behind a piece of garbage? What if every employee in every company stole office supplies? How soon would the results show up on your personal salary through reduced pay hikes?

See what I mean? Notice how often you conclude your actions don’t matter while overlooking your impact. Yet in these examples, isn’t each of us ‘just’ one person? For now, can you at least allow that you absolutely affect your immediate circles? I’ve heard it said this way: “To one person in the world, you are the world.”

Meet Your “Gremlin”

So, what’s going on to cause us to spend so little time acknowledging the difference we make? Bet you’re giving yourself some nasty self-talk on the order of “How dare I brag about myself?” or “Who do you think you are?” Am I right? I suspect so – regrettably.

In coaching, Gremlin is the name given to this negative inner voice that robs us of our glory. Do you recognize yours? We all have one. And, the Gremlin uses exactly the right tone and words to put us in our place. Where did it come from, you wonder? Originally, many of us received well-intentioned messages from teachers, parents and other authority figures discouraging us from boasting and other “inappropriate” behaviours. When we didn’t have the right information, we didn’t know how to separate such unhelpful scripts from the useful advice.

Today, we own the power of conscious choice. If we let it, this task-master would weaken us with self-created smallness twenty-four hours a day. That means it’s up to us to purposefully shut off the ‘tap’ on the Gremlin’s endless ‘drip’.

The Top Ten List

This month’s Top Ten list offers five Do’s and five Don’ts to strongly counter-act the voice of your harsh critic:

Do stand proudly in your individuality.
Do examine your belief systems about your “power of one”.
Do itemize whose lives you impact.
Do specify how you make a difference in their worlds.
Do name 25 ways you’re unique.
Don’t shy away from your greatness.
Don’t internalize others’ messages.
Don’t stop yourself in your tracks!
Don’t abdicate responsibility for your part on planet Earth.
Don’t believe the world would be the same without you.

Parting Reflections

As a “bonus” to help you reclaim your splendour, here’s an exercise from my coaching studies that involves writing a life purpose statement on this model: “I am the…that has others…” To fill in the blanks, my statement reads: “I am the reflecting pool that has others bask in their brilliance and reclaim their inner truth.”

Just like the vision statements you see defined at work, this is what my purpose means to me – and by extension to others:

Reflecting pool – by gazing into ‘my’ pool, you see reflected back your true essence
Bask – giving yourself the right to relish how ‘x-ceptional’ you really are
Brilliance – suggests great brightness, sparkling, radiant qualities
Reclaim – as in, taking back what was yours in the first place
Inner truth – your truth about what’s right by you and nobody else

I share my statement to illustrate my commitment to all of you. I so want you to ‘get’ the brilliance that is yours alone. Breathe in how wonderful you are! There has never been – and never will be again – anyone quite like you. Can you imagine that?

Clearing the Clutter

May 1, 2011 By Carol-Ann Leave a Comment

The Costs of Clutter

Whether at work or home, I’m sure each of us has experienced difficult concentration in a cluttered space. Doesn’t all that mess practically demand attention? With its constant “call”, accumulated (negative) energy places you at great risk of failing to get any productive work done. But that’s not the end of the story.

Yes, your clutter affects you big-time. Do you realize it can keep you stuck in the past? It’s a big contributor to feeling lethargic, confused – and just plain dulled in your senses. At its worst, overwhelming mass mounts up to such a degree that the weight ultimately crushes you and leads to physical illness.

A very steep price to pay, isn’t it?

So, What’s It About?

In the past – distant or otherwise – you may have purchased those now-weary items to help you feel better in some way. They hopefully enhanced your joy at least for a while. No psychologist or Feng Shui expert, what I can say today is their usefulness and positivity long ago wore out their welcome. Didn’t they?

What happened, to turn the tables? How does clutter now “kill” your body, mind and spirit? The thing is, many become so consumed dealing with their “toys” and objects that the obsession robs precious time from self-care. Our unavailability to self-nurturing leads to slow and then escalating compromise of physical and emotional health.

What a sure-fire recipe for putting your life on hold. Oh my!

Consider this: If your unconscious can maneuver your light-filled Real Self into running around totally scatter-brained, you’ll never move forward with cherished hopes and dreams. That’s what makes clutter such a dark and insidious way of keeping you stuck.

At its worst, clutter causes you to self-sabotage in the extreme so you actually prevent the arrival of all those good things you say you yearn for. In effect, you block your own “flow” of health, wealth and happiness. Wow.

The Top Ten List

Naturally, this destructive process is largely sub-conscious. The shadowy under-currents lurking beneath disorganization don’t want you to have this information. I do!

To shed light on “what’s in it for you” to lastingly purge your every bit of clutter please allow your inner core to receive these “benefit statements”:

Obtain clarity to decide what you want in all arenas – work, home, health, finances, relationships, fun and recreation, growth and development.
Get mobilized to become unstuck.
Boost your concentration power.
Accomplish more because you’re focused on goals and priorities.
Eliminate all distracting factors to going after your dreams.
Remove barriers that block what you truly desire.
Release new vitality by freeing up stale energy.
Reignite your inner “fire” and commitment to your best life.
Create space for the arrival of new people, experiences and opportunities by removing reminders of negative past memories embedded within the objects themselves (every single thing surrounding us is “energy” – good or bad).
Reclaim your confidence and self-esteem (as you get back on top of every part of your life).

Parting Reflections

On a more humorous note, sadly-departed George Carlin had it so right in his famous comedy sketch. Its essence was that we need to get ever-larger homes and storage facilities for the sole reason to house all our “stuff” (not to give us more space in which to live). While in jest, Carlin got at the heart of what we’ve been talking about.

On a reflective note, you’ll never guess who said these words: “It is an act of courage to throw away clothes we no longer need.” Believe it or not, that was Fritjof Nansen, Norwegian explorer and statesman. I agree with Mr. Nansen. It does take a leap of faith to let go of all those “things” that no longer serve and merely inundate us.

So, if I were a fly on the wall in your workspace and home after you put down this article, how soon will I see evidence of your clearing efforts?

I think I feel it now…the cleansing breath of fresh air you allowed to bring all that new energy your way!